"Firsts"

First. That word, though just a word, seems to mean so much to so many people. It's a status - "First class". It's a happening - "First presentation". It's a moment in time - "First kiss". My sister-in-law got married in September. She floated on air, as she should because she was marrying her first love.

I don't know what most women go through when they watch another wedding take place, but I yearn to go back in time and get married again. My first wedding to my first real love who I am with still, thankfully. That was SUCH a fun time...getting married. Planning and looking wonderful while everyone happily watched my sweetheart and I commit to each other. Just like your first kiss....you can never get that feeling back again. You have to capture it and savor it.

I remember my first kiss...I still think about it every once in a while. It was a yummy kiss (oh... so yummy). Sometimes I can even smell the scent of Big Red gum...the gum that the guy was chewing when he kissed me. Wow. I'll never have that moment again. Sure there are other yummy kisses, but that very FIRST one set the stage for the rest of my sensual life. Your firsts do set a standard, don't they? Once you have something good the first time, you will always want that again and more of it. When a woman gets a yucky kiss as her first, ohhhh boy...they will search forever just to find out what a good kiss feels like.

I know when I watched my sis-in-law walk down that aisle...I wished to do the same again with my husband. I remembered him standing there at the end of the aisle waiting anxiously to have me next to him. I could marry him again, but it won't be the same. It won't be my first. Now we are parents, with our 1st child in '06. Talk about firsts. I have loved every bit of my "firsts" with her. When she was 9 months old, she had lots of firsts. I'll be anxious to watch my daughter go through the same firsts as I have - hopefully with the same feelings as I have had.

My best advice for anyone regarding firsts...write them down, scrapbook it, save that moment some way other than in your mind. On your down days when you look back you will see that your records of your "firsts" could easily bring your mood back to a happy place... maybe even beckon you to seek out your next "first".